Necessary Heartbreak

I’ve never had my heartbroken before the beginning of this year. That’s when it happened to me for the first time. I hate to say this, but I’ve always been the one to do the breaking before this February.

I always felt repulsed with the way people responded to heartbreak.. at least the ones caused by me. I felt like their reaction was uncalled for. To me it felt like they were grieving for an object that they lost, like I was a nice pair of shoes that had been stolen.

I was mistaken.
It’s true what they say, you can’t really understand something until you’ve been through it for yourself. Now I finally understand, and it wasn’t like that at all.

Your grief isn’t selfish. It isn’t uncalled for. It isn’t an inconvenience. You aren’t just upset over the loss of the person.

You are grieving the life you had pictured with them. You are grieving the memories. The jokes only they understood. And all the empty spaces they once filled up.

I’m so disappointed with myself, that it took me this long to understand. To finally have compassion for the heartbroken.

I wouldn’t wish this on anyone but myself.
This is a weight I needed to carry.