It’s enough

It’s enough to have gone there with you,

Even if we couldn’t stay.

It’s enough to have known you,

And the love you gave.

Some people wait all there lives,

And never know it.

Never see it.

Never taste it.

But we did.

Satsung,

I know you felt it too.

What it feels like now

There’s this empty space where you used to be. You were such a huge part of me. And now it’s just empty.

When I drive by coral reef I see our parking spots. The tree we hugged under. The table we always sat at giggling like kids. Doodling on coffee cups.

When I’m headed to work I’m forced to drive past the place we kissed for the first time. I always turn to see if maybe.. just maybe.. your car is parked under those windows we daydreamed about having one day. I told you that would be my reading nook, and we joked that we hoped ours had a better view than the empty parking lot.

But I would have taken an empty parking lot view with you.

When I pull out onto the main road leaving my apartments, I’m face to face with the store. The one where we met. The one where you were my boss, then my best friend, then my soul mate.The one where we both know what happened in the break room (no cameras).

The one I vowed never to go into again. The one that I can no longer look at without a subtle stab of pain. The place that once held, and still does hold, some of the best years of my life. Where I met some of the best people on this planet and yet still can’t bring myself to go back to. That painfully beautiful place that I will never forget.

What losing you feels like now, after the distance of six or so months is a subtle ache. An empty feeling in the pit of my stomach. No matter how good it gets, you would make it better. A forever longing.

A never ending feeling of something missing.

Satsung

Sometimes I forget,

That I have to let myself grieve.

Who knew all of this empty

Could take up so much space?

I didn’t just lose you.

I lost a piece of

Me.